When I was a little girl, I can remember telling people that my Grandma was 54. That seemed like such a big number…

And I had a 50th birthday party for my Mom at her house. It was a surprise and we had a great time! So many of her friends showed up, some she hadn’t seen in years and they laughed and danced. I remember the cake that I made and decorated for her. My daughter was an infant and she was in my arms for parts of the evening.

Now, it’s my turn. Honestly, 50 and me in the same sentence still doesn’t sound right. I mean, when did that happen?!?? I don’t feel 50 (at least I don’t think that I do), but what do I know I’m new at this!

What I do know is that I’m grateful. I’m living in Costa Rica with a man that I love. My children are healthy. His children are healthy. I have friends and family whom I love. And though I was a bit bummed that nobody could make it here for my big birthday (I did ask kinda late), I have made friends here who will no doubt make it memorable.

I feel gratitude that I am healthy. I’m thankful that I made it to 50; I’ve earned every year. I have too many friends and family who sadly never lived to see 50 years young. It is sobering.

It’s weird. I feel like there should be this big shift, I don’t know. I’ll just enjoy today and the days and years to come with peace and joy.